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[ad] Today I am dreaming of Christmas parties. Anyone else? We’re only halfway through the month and we’ve already had more family gatherings than I can count with so many more to go. And Christmas parties in the Bartlett household means photos…lots of photos. But I just didn't feel very photo-ready thanks to my grays (and yes, I had A LOT of grays). So I picked up @zotosprofessional hair color at @sallybeauty and these days I'm feeling gorgeous, confident, and ready to take on the holiday photos. Today on the blog, I'm sharing how I get myself photo-ready as well as what I plan to wear to this year's Christmas party! #MyAgeBeautiful #sponsored #linkinbio
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[ad] Today I am dreaming...

I've been a bit MIA lately. Why you may ask? Well, because I've been half on the struggle bus and half working on a rather large project that I've had in draft mode for far too long. And I am SO excited about it. I literally woke up the other day and decided THAT was the day I'd get started on it and I've been hooked on it ever since. If you're a mom in Southern Maine, you won't want to miss this! So be sure to sign up for our email list via the link in my bio so you can be one of the first to know what's going on.
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I've been a bit MIA...

Well, it's officially the day Zack and I have been looking forward to for a couple of years now. While we've already unofficially been "moved on" from military life for a couple of months now, today it's official that Zack is no longer an Active Duty Marine and I am no longer a military spouse. The first big chapter of his adult life and our life together has officially ended. It's scary almost when you've been living with all the stability of a lifestyle for so long. A stable job, stable income, health benefits, a home. It's been a challenging couple of months as we get more settled here in Maine and figure out the next step for our little family. But I know we have so much to look forward to in the next year and it's refreshing to know we have the opportunity to start over. I am so proud of this guy and I can't wait to see what the next chapter of our life has in store for us. •
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Well, it's officially the day...

This mama is on the struggle bus today. This morning I spent over an hour searching for Allie's sippy cup of milk only to find it in the shower...where I looked 5+ times considering that's where she was playing while I got ready for the day. I then got the incorrect order from Dunkin and to make that even worse, it was pumpkin flavored...and if you know me, you know I cannot stand anything pumpkin flavored so I couldn't even suck it up and drink it (shoutout to @mwhited8195 for bringing me the correct drink order!). Nap time wasn't any better. A solid 40 minutes of crying before Allie finally went down...then she woke up 30 minutes later 🙄 And now I'm scrambling to get everything on my to-do list done so we can officially launch Blogmas tomorrow 😬 It's been a morning and I'm about ready for my own nap at this point. But at least it's Friday? 🤷🏻‍♀️😂
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This mama is on the...

It's yet another snow day here in Maine. The last winter I spent here was in 2015 and we maybe had three snow storms all winter. This year, we've had 3-5 just in the last couple of weeks 🙄 I'm already homesick for beautiful and warm North Carolina summers 😔 anyone else here who hates winter? If you need us, Allie and I will be curled up inside with some movies and a never-ending to-do list. #bloggerlife •
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It's yet another snow day...

Blogmas starts in T-5 days! I've been working so hard on producing awesome Blogmas content these past couple of months so I'm super excited to finally start sharing it with you all this weekend. Today on the blog I'm sharing a quick breakdown of Blogmas 2018, what you can look forward to on Mainely Keating, and 25 blog post ideas for those of you who want to participate in Blogmas as well! You can find the link to the full blog post in my bio! •
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Blogmas starts in T-5 days!...

How To Resolve Marriage Problems Like A Pro

How To Resolve Marriage Problems Like A Pro | Why Hello Lovely

Zack and I are very fortunate to not have had too many big arguments so far in our marriage. Do we argue? Of course! Every couple argues. But we typically bicker more than we have big, legitimate arguments. We’re generally pretty easy going and we get along and communicate our issues really well…for the most part.  But it’s taken years of experience from past relationships to get to a point where I can communicate how I’m feeling and prevent arguments before they occur. Good communication skills take time to develop.

No one likes arguing with their significant other, but believe it not, there are ways to make arguments less stressful and upsetting. And sometimes, there are even ways to avoid them as well. Here are my top five tips for resolving marriage problems like a pro.

PICK AND CHOOSE YOUR BATTLES.

Learn to determine when an issue is significant enough to argue over it. Money issues? Yes, that can be a big deal. Whether or not your husbands puts down the toilet seat, is a completely insignificant issue. Yes, it would be nice if they remembered to do that kind of thing and to us, it’s not that complicated or time consuming to do. But it’s in no way worth arguing over. It’s so important to be able to recognize when an issue isn’t worth causing an argument about and when it’s time to move on with your life. I promise you probably only about 20% of the things that bother you are actual issues. Everything else can be set aside.

GO TO BED ANGRY.

No seriously. Do it. I don’t care what anyone says. Sometimes you just need to go to sleep and clear your head. I’ve always been one of those people who absolutely needs to have the problem solved before I go to bed. But then the argument drags on and nothing actually gets accomplished. At that point, the argument only ends because the two of you are sick of fighting. Someone caves in and agrees to things they really don’t care about simply because they want the argument to end. This isn’t a way to end an argument by any means. Is it great that it’s over? Of course. But if nothing real is being solved then it’s best to sleep it off and what until morning.

The way I look at is is, if you were fighting about something important then by the morning, you’ll both feel a little more refreshed and can then tackle the issue in a calmer manner. If it’s something dumb and insignificant like that darn toilet seat again, then chances are you’ll wake up like it never happened. And if you’re still mad the next morning over something that ridiculous, then you need to go back to #1 on this list an learn to pick and choose your battles. I always feel better after getting some sleep and we never drag out our arguments longer than they need to.

ADMIT WHEN YOU’RE WRONG.

This can be challenging for both men and women. No one likes to be wrong. This has always been my biggest issue and I know it’s very hard for Zack as well. We both love to be the one who’s always right and it’s very hard for us to admit when we’re in the wrong. But this is a must if you want a successful marriage.  And I don’t mean you have to apologize and say it just to end the argument. Please don’t do that, actually. Again, that doesn’t help anymore. But you need to understand that you’re not always right. As hard as it is, sometimes you’re wrong. You need to be able to take a step back, recognize it, and admit when you’re wrong so that the two of you can come up with a plan to move forward.

LEARN HOW TO SAY “I’M SORRY”

When I say this, I don’t mean to apologize because you feel like you have to. This is the same concept as admitting when you’re wrong. When you apologize for something, you should truly be sorry for whatever it is that you did. Sometimes all the other person needs is an apology to move past it. But an apology should always come with follow up actions. If you apologize for not helping out around the house, then you need to follow up with doing your best to help more. You can’t just say sorry and pretend it never happened. The argument is bound to get brought up again in the future if nothing is actually changing.

DON’T BRING UP PAST ARGUMENTS.

When an argument is done then leave it at that. Don’t bring it back up again in your next argument. No one wants to be reminded of that one time they took too many jello shots and got too pissed off at their spouse for no reason 5 years ago. No one cares and that argument is no longer relevant when you’re currently arguing over the toilet seat again. You’ve discussed it, you’ve apologized, you’ve worked through it, so move on. It’s over and done with.

What has helped you and your spouse resolve marriage problems?

XOXO
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